23 March 2015

How love turns into suffocation?

How love turns into suffocation?

Love, We all have been in relationship in some or other point of life if not that then we surely have experienced some part of it. Its just the matter of fact that we commit or not. More over its more like matter of Guts, I say it this way because I just want to highlight all about those relationship which shatter right at the point of their Golden Phase. Marriage.

I want to thank one of my reader for adding domain in my thinking and asking me to write about this topic. Its fun though, actually it is one of the interesting thing to think about. More common in a relationship which somewhere in the middle of the time looses its attraction and Charm.

If we talk about the most stable relationship, its always characterized by the balance in between love and hate. And the sooner love starts fading off all we experience is hate. Which is sufficient enough to suffocate you emotionally in any of the feeling.

If we talk about close relationships then all close relationships are  accompanied by tension because they involve sacrifice of individual needs to accommodate the requirements of a couple. There are points when one has to leave his needs and think about a way out so that it soothes both the person in relationship. Ironically whenever something fails in the end of the relationship one only use to blame the other one for the failing part as well as hold the person countable for all the sacrifices which they have made for that relationship.
They forget that the sacrifices was not made to show them, it was for their own welfare. There own emotions and their own LOVE.

Its same as the point that you like anything which is happening with you as a positive feel till its soothing you, the moment things break you become agitated from the situation and you start finding flaws in all the thing which is happening.
If more of this happens then certainly the very same relationship which was life for you at point start becoming a suffocating factor of your life and you just want to get over with it.

Hatred is a factor that also arises with "How dare he/she do that to me?" this is one of my personal experience from time. I was just trying to hold back, and accept my apology for the break up. It was my personal fault and I was holding myself responsible for this. "Things went well at that point of time.
Later "Through out several days I was busy in explaining "How the hell I did that?" , At point I was sorry but when the same thing was dragged to a month. I was like. Lets get over this.

If some one is really sorry for his mistake, forgive him but don't show/fight with him/her for the thing "How he/she did that?" certainly at point these relationship are ought to failure.

"Love is really important in an relationship but suffocation can kill all the feelings of love which you are trying to save."

And when you are going to hold something responsible for this then its just that you are too intimate to be beared. One of the different aspect of suffocation is when you start seeing some other girl or guy, and the first one with whom you are in a relationship use to be just a pain , which you want to remove from your life. Lately it has been popular with a month relationship or other. I don't count them with a relationship either. Because I say that to be an obsession "Obsession about experiencing what relationship is?"

If you wanna get clear with the fact, then it is more like thinking back about your teenage self when you once wanted to know about what is relationship  & you use to develop an idea and an answer for the very same from the set of stuff which you knew about love and from the another set which you observed from people.

 Lets try to look on the

Signs You’re Suffocating Your Partner

1- You feel like he’s/she's withdrawn from you, emotionally or physically but reality is that he/she is  so busy with his/her professional life which sometimes you overlook.
2- You never feel like you can get close enough to your partner.
3- Your partner tells you he feels suffocated in your relationship.
4- When you start fighting with him/her for the matter which was told by your friend or any other XYZ person.

If you really believe that you are suffocating your partner here are few steps which you need to try to keep a hold on your relationship

Ways to Stop Smothering Your Partner

1- Take time for yourself.
2- Give your partner time, space, and room to breathe – both literally and metaphorically.
3- Enjoy your own hobbies and interests. Stay in touch with yourself.
4- Take time away from one another – “Let there be spaces in your togetherness.”
5- Know who you are as a person, separate from your partner.


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© 2015, copyright Sankalp Singh


  1. Strong one for the lifestyles we are living these days. Love has changed its definition but as you said when frequencies of definition matches,relationship has a long road ahead.
    I would conclude with this that at times you feel like your partner's presence suffocates you for all the restrictions made by them and their continuous approaches but you forget that these were the same things which made you feel 'aww' and go gaga about your boyfriend or girlfriend.
    So its all about fading things,memories and feelings.

    1. Well, its more like the opeing sentence , when love starts loosing its charm.

  2. Is this charm of love glows forever and ever?

    1. That certainly depends I guess, On the kind of relationship which we are talking about. "But as we grow there are points when tension take over the charm".

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Thanks for finding time to write down what you felt.